My People, I am sure most of you have not recovered from the awesome display of trendy clothes that my family showed off at the National Sports Stadium on Defence Forces Day.
LETTER TO MY PEOPLE BY DOCTOR STOP IT
Even Queen Elizabeth herself would have been extremely green with envy because on the day I looked like Princess Diana.
I am sure all of you were watching me, as you always do. All the haters who have been wishing the worst for my son who has not been well were very disappointed.
To those who did not know, my son had a tooth ache three weeks ago and he had to be airlifted to Singapore in order to receive medical attention.
Sorry, I digress from the topic. It must be all those medical drugs that make my mind stray.
Back to the National Sports Stadium, I am sure all of you were envious of the rasta revolution going on in my family as my boys displayed trendy fledgling dreadlocks.
My son-in-law was in tow but we don’t allow him to wear dreadlocks. People would ask how it was possible that the Iconic African Revolutionary married his daughter to a rasta. The gossip has started that one of my boys had fake dreadlocks but I don’t care! Munopenga! You are crazy!
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You are just jealous that a typist is ruling over you. I told you at the Chiweshe rally that ndiri panyanga. I am in charge. In fact, I was thinking how Eriza, the wife of Moregirls, together with Mboko’s wife and myself should get together, plan how to take over and really show you what girl power is all about.
I have done my part and all those spineless men kneel before me, while Eriza has flexed her delicate and beautiful muscles by installing those Masvingo boys, Nelson and Elias as deputy presidents in her husband’s private company called MDC-T. A girl has to take care of her future, in case something happens.
Mrs Mboko, well you can only underestimate that lass from Mozambique at your own peril.
She has virtually pulled a middle finger at the whole government and declared all the houses in Harare are not suitable for her family. The only acceptable option was to stay in a five-star hotel for more than a year. Now that is what I call class and girl power.
Ngwena is finished
Far from what many of you have always thought, that Crocodhakisi Ngwena was invincible, I have proved that it was always a mirage. I am currently skinning him alive and his war friends have tried all they can to defend and propel him upwards, but with very little success.
As I have said before, I am in charge so he can’t win this one. Now you see what I meant that you will be ruled from the grave.
He may be holding meaningless meetings with July and other hangers-on but he is proving that without support from the Comrade Dear Brother Supreme Leader, he is a powerless nobody.
I pulled the rug from under his feet after I convinced Mudhara to appoint MPs from Midlands to senior government positions. The MPs immediately defected to the Gushungo 40 faction.
Now we are going for the jugular by calling for an extraordinary congress in his fortress of Masvingo. The idea is to have conference resolutions from Victoria Falls and have a woman appointed one of the vice-presidents . That is when I will sashay into the presidium.
When Mandiwetela Chimenemene attacked Crocodhakisi, many feared for her life but we have always told you that the worst he can do is to smile sheepishly or quack like a duck. Mbokonomics
I want to commend Mboko for being a leading light in the country’s industrialisation drive. He has travelled across the country just to visit and tour some dams, roads, bridges and other government projects. That’s real leadership for me.
In the process, he has been donating chicks to women voters as part of the industrialisation drive, as enshrined under ZimAsset to ensure industrialisation and household food security. Smart leadership indeed.
With everybody becoming a chicken farmer, Zimbabwe is set to reclaim its position of being the bread basket of Africa and we will all export chickens, chicken eggs and even chicken droppings and feathers.
We will open factories so that we export canned eggs and with the billions expected from Dangote, China, Japan and Russia, nobody will ask about the missing $15 billion. Munhuwese kuna Amai! Maproject kuvakwasha! Umasalu wezwelonke! MaGay40 woyeee! Dr Amai Marujata PhD (Fake) l Feedback: [email protected]
