HomeOpinion & AnalysisThe solidarity of comedians

The solidarity of comedians

BY DOCTOR STOP IT

My Dear People,
I know I don’t find you well because Dhakisi Ngwena and his Lacoste faction in government have all, but destroyed this country.

As most of you will no doubt remember, when Gushungo, Robert Mugabe The Great was elbowed out of power, a loaf of bread was just one dollar.

Now, most of you cannot afford to eat bread.

Others have not eaten meat for a long time and are having to do with vegetables and chunks. Serves you right for being foolishly used by the Lacoste faction without thinking of the implications.

The kombi fare in urban areas when Mugabe was illegally removed from power was 50 cents.

That policeman who was famously filmed declaring that people would no longer afford to buy beer was so correct after all.

People can’t afford to buy beer as it is now almost equivalent to the cost of a chicken, while several beers are now almost equal to the cost of a single goat.

The situation continues to deteriorate while those clowns in government continue moving around with their circus uniform — the scarf.

And as we continue moving towards the end of the year in which people will be hoping to feast and celebrate, those hopes are likely to be dashed by the Lacoste government faction.

They are planning to steal Christmas from you.

Our thoughts and prayers are with Lazarus Boora, aka Gringo who is reportedly in hospital over a complicated medical condition.

Gringo, a well known comedian has brought laughter to many Zimbabweans and we wish him well.

We are sure other “comedians” such as Nelson Chamisa meant well when they visited Gringo in hospital during the past week.

Chamisa the comedian is well known for crude jokes such as pledging his sister in a gamble with Lacoste and for grabbing the microphone from his wife in public.

So, it was important for Chamisa to visit a fellow comedian in hospital and we hope he did not go to visit while carrying his hands only.

They call them clowns.

The other comedian or clown was busy eating mazondo in an expensive private plane.

It has often been said that mazondo soup is ideal for mixing with aphrodisiacs.

That could explain why some senior citizens become very randy like old goats and end up siring children with students on attachment at their farms.

Meanwhile, what is happening in the party of the MDC-A? That party is full of lawyers, but you wonder why they always fail to make legally sound political decisions.

And in the other house of horrors, Zanu PF, what is the situation with the DCCs?

Have they discovered that as Dr Amai Stop it! once famously said, Gushungo, through the G40 is ruling from the grave?

Zapu has no commander

It was very intriguing to see the Zanu PF politics at play when Bulawayo governor or provincial minister or whatever they call themselves, Judith Ncube telling Vice-President Kembo Mohadi that recruitment for student nursing places in Matebeleland was now almost exclusively reserved for people outside the provinces.

Comrade Kembo mumbled something to the effect that government was not responsible for the recruitment policies or something like that.

Sad.

Little wonder when Joshua Nkomo died, the people sang: “We have lost our commander!”

The revelations on the student nurses were such a humiliation and a government minister revealed that they were decentralising the recruitment system of student nurses to provinces, leaving people unsure of what was the correct position.

Or who was telling the truth, or lies!

The police and the image of Zimbabwe

Relations between the Zimbabwe Republic Police and journalists need to improve as a matter of urgency.

In fact, the police need to change the way that they interact with journalists.

For Zimbabwean police, the instinct appears to be that if they see journalists, they should beat them up.

That is completely wrong and thanks to the brutality of the police, Zimbabwe continues to be rated as a place, which is not safe for journalists to work from.

The police actions are succeeding in portraying Zimbabwe as a pariah state.

A place where basic freedoms are curtailed and where anyone can be beaten in broad daylight by officers wearing a government issued uniform!

It was not a simple coincidence that on the day that riot police  beat up a female student journalist, Ruvimbo Muchenje, a vendor was reported to have died after allegedly being beaten by police details.

Gushungo Chete Chete!

Chatunga Chete Chete!

Munhuwese Kuna Amai!

Dr Amai Stop it! PhD (Fake)

l Feedback: Doctorstopit@gmail.com

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