Like sport, politics is highly emotional. Supporters will go to any lengths to defend their team or political leader.
Report by Grace Mutandwa Some political leaders achieve a demi-god status and because of that some supporters ascribe asexual roles to their leaders. When the supporters are faced with evidence that their leader does have a very mobile sexual life, they will come up with all sorts of excuses on behalf of the leader.
The reality is that leaders are human. Just like you and me, they also make mistakes — they are not infallible. The problem is that when leaders mess up, they never claim responsibility. There is always a shadow following them waiting for them to fall! Other people make mistakes and other people are wrong or bad — never them. Denial is a river in Africa and many politicians drink from it!
That the Prime Minister of Zimbabwe, Morgan Tsvangirai, has the right to marry a woman of his choice is not in dispute. What is, is the route he has travelled to find a woman to spend the rest of his life with — hopefully.
There is a reason why our ancestors advised both men and women to go through a period of courtship. It was meant for the two to get to know each other, not to see who was the fastest at undressing! It would also give both parties the opportunity to ask around and find out as much as possible about each other’s background, temperament, strengths and weaknesses.
A whistle-stop courtship is bound to end in tears. While some men are courting, they are also looking for bed warmers. This is the reason why some men will have four women on the go. Out of those four, none might actually be the intended life partner. They might just be amusement parks.
Women on the other hand easily believe the promises and lies made in the throes of passion. Women who have marriage on the mind might give milk for free in the hope of sealing the deal. But when the deal falls through, some women might not simply walk away because at some point the man changed his mind or forgot to tell her that he was just after a roll in the hay.
Women who have no intention of marrying peddle it on the streets for money. They have very clear needs — they want your money and nothing else, so they will not make any other demands. Men keen on sampling and moving on must be honest right from the beginning or go shopping on the streets. Such men should also use protection and stop fathering children they have no intention of watching grow.
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We all know some men have exploding libidos. That is the reason why tradition allows men to marry as many women as they can look after.
The Prime Minister might want to uphold Christian values by marrying in church, but that ship sailed a long time ago. When he left evidence of a man about town in Bulawayo, he should have used that opportunity to try and redeem himself.
Good leaders accept responsibility
What we now know is that the PM is not a strong advocate for safe sex. He is always the wrongly accused. Never mind the stories from Harare to Norton! That too might just be a conspiracy. Here is a leader who is accused of siring a child in Bulawayo moving onto another woman and impregnating her and then turning around and telling her he is unwilling to marry her.
A man who is seen as a human rights defender should walk the talk. The measure of a good leader is seen by his ability to accept responsibility for his mistakes, the ability to apologise and the maturity to treat others with respect.
Women need respect
Impunity does not only apply to the political and economic spheres, but also to the way one handles human relationships. Leaders who have a misguided sense of entitlement and think nothing of preying on the emotions of weak women need honest advisers and supporters who tell them that what they are doing is wrong.
A self-respecting man will also respect the women he meets on his courtship journey. Talking about women’s and human rights in abstract terms does not make a good leader. A leader’s whole demeanour must be one that ignites confidence in the populace.
Women also need to do due diligence on the men they associate with. Do not be overwhelmed by promises of power and wealth. While I accept that it is a woman’s right to love someone who does not love her back, I think it is the height of self-hatred to drag yourself through the mud for a man who has nothing good to say about you. It is also a woman’s right to join a political harem in the hope that she will eventually be the leader of the pack. It is also a woman’s right to inflict as much public embarrassment and pain on herself as she sees fit if it will give her closure or some level of satisfaction.
But any woman who is used and spurned would make better use of her time and emotions by moving on and having a very good life. Hanging onto something in top flight is just a waste of time. Politicians will always claim that some spooks are after them but you must always remember that at some point politicians lose touch with reality. Political leaders have the right to see shadows but they should not take everyone on their crazy journey.
Of course there are genuine cases where spooks are all over the place. But leaders who cannot curb their desires should know that a honey-trap only catches someone who goes hunting. I admit there might be political opponents out to destroy the Prime Minister, but from where I stand, he is doing a very good job of it himself.
No one needs to spend US$10, let alone US$100 million, just to visit a sexual scandal on the Prime Minister. The spooks can’t touch you if you make it hard for them by leading a clean life. And any political opponent who does not take advantage of the Prime Minister’s bungling must be mad.
The Prime Minister hopes to lead this country one day, and he must show leadership in all his dealings. His advisers and supporters might not have the guts to be honest with him because they one day hope to gain from his patronage, but his true friends must tell him the truth, even if he does not want to hear it. What message is he sending to women? He should be a better role model for the men around us.
For feedback email: [email protected]/twitter@GraceMutandwa1
