Those lucky pregnant women, with their swollen ankles and morning sickness, are all-but guaranteed a nice, comfy seat on the underground.
— The Independent UK
Commuters will happily leap up from their spot at the mere sight of a ballooning belly (unless, of course, the woman is at the beginning of her second trimester and you’re forced to play popular public transport game, “paunch or pregnant?”, which can have serious consequences if you get the answer wrong).
Last week, it has em-erged that one woman in Beijing hated standing so much that she actually purchased a fake silicon belly to wear on crowded subways in the hope of encouraging others to give up their seat for her.
However, the ruse failed after the belt tying it to her waist came loose and the belly farcically dropped to the ground, much to the amusement of fellow travellers. The woman then lodged a complaint with the manufacturers, who all had a good laugh about it too.
If anyone wants to try it over here but wishes to avoid such humiliation, then why not just hit up the Pizza Hut buffet, pin one of those “baby on board” badges to your lapel, hop on board and wait for everyone to vacate their seats? Commuting bliss awaits.
Beautiful wife
There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You’re beautiful!” and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that, so she stayed by his side. A couple of minutes later, his eyes fluttered open and he said “You’re cute!” Well, the wife was dissapointed because instead of “beautiful”, it was “cute.” She said, “What happened to ‘beautiful’?” He replied: “The drugs are wearing off!”
