Greetings from Singapore,
BY DOCTOR STOP IT
I am sure all of you are aware that there is an addition to the great Royal Ruling First Family. Because of the despicable conditions of hospitals in Zimbabwe, there is no way my grandchild would have been delivered in those death traps.
So we came to Singapore where service delivery is world class. Kkkkkk, actually we don’t use health institutions in Zimbabwe. We get the money then spend it elsewhere.
I read somewhere that women in rural areas now prefer to deliver in their homes because they think it’s much safer at home than in hospitals.
Is it that bad? I wouldn’t know because I have no business visiting those smelly hospitals.
The same applies for our children’s education. How can they attend some decrepit local university where some degrees can be bought over the counter?
Kwaaaaaaa! Some naughty people have been going on and on alleging that I bought my doctorate. I will not comment on that one.
Back to the poor state of health and education delivery systems, some mischievous elements, including Joice and Moregirls, have been telling people that they were run down because of 36 years of misrule.
Goodness me, how can it be misrule when millions of Zimbabweans now know what an aeroplane is after they successfully fled their country due to alleged political violence, lack of economic opportunities, hunger, poor education and health delivery?
Actually, the real reason why education and health delivery are dead in the water is because of the racist western sponsored sanctions which were slapped on us because of political violence against the opposition and white farmers.
Of course, we all know that one of the reasons why the economic sanctions were imposed on us was because we took our land back.
How could we have all the prime land in the hands of a minority group of Rhodesians, while the majority was wallowing in abject poverty caused by farming on unproductive land?
Thanks to the successful implementation of the land reform, the prime land is now in the hands of a few connected relatives, friends and politicians.
Kkkkkkkkkk. Guess what percentage of Zimbabwe my family, extended family and friends own?
What is happening in football?
I generally don’t follow developments in football, but my faction was solidly behind the Warriors over the Easter holidays. The boys were in total control. Even over independence I am told they spent the whole afternoon watching football.
A lot of intriguing things are taking place in football. I hear one of those boys with a lot of money wants to buy the Warriors captain, Willard Katsande a beautiful car.
Really, that would be very nice and patriotic because it shows that when the sponsor can reward some of his boys with vehicles, he really knows how to motivate them.
I think he also needs to motivate that tall defender, Costa Nhamoinesu. I think he should also buy him a beautiful BMW and that way, his boys will give maximum performances on the rectangle.
Even more intriguing is the story of the alleged match-fixing ahead of the Swaziland matches. Something just didn’t add up from the beginning and still does not today.
The South Africans appear to be treating the allegations of match-fixing in their league as a cock and bull story.
Of course, I have refused to believe the cynical allegations by some that those who were crying “wolf” the loudest could contribute immensely to the investigations.
Burnin’ ‘n Looting
You people, what is all this that I am hearing about the use of fire to settle scores?
I hear the tractors that I donated for an irrigation programme in Matabeleland South were set on fire. I suspect some Lacoste people are behind that fire.
I am still to confirm reports that a senior G40 member had his rural homestead set on fire.
But when I mentioned in Mashonaland Central that some soldiers want to bomb my dairy you thought I was lying.
Munopenga! (You are crazy!)
Now you see how these people are prepared to use terror tactics in order to defeat my faction in the race to succeed Gushaz.
They want to instill fear in us by threatening the lives of those we love like family and relatives.
I suspect Joice may also have a hand in that.
Equally, I am intrigued by a certain coincidence. At a meeting with the Old Man, war veterans said they were not stakeholders in Zanu PF but stockholders.
A certain senior soldier repeated the same assertion over the Independence Holidays.
Coincidence? Coaching? Rehearsals? Munopenga!
Munhuwese kuna Amai
Dr Amai Ph.D (Fake)
l Feedback: Doctorstopit@gmail.com