By Tim Middleton
A number of soccer players have recently faced racist abuse from rival supporters during matches, when the fans made monkey noises each time a coloured player had the ball. Such behaviour was clearly unacceptable. However, a neutral observer will rightly be tempted to question if those players’ supporters’ behaviour was any better when they in turn taunted their opponents’ fans with derogatory names and whistled through their opponents’ national anthem. Or was verbal abuse any worse or indeed different than other fans’ notorious use of alcohol-induced violence prior to soccer matches? Why is it only racist abuse that stirs our concerns?
Of course, it should not surprise us that such behaviour is seen when leaders of countries engage in public taunting of those who happen to be fans of the opposition. Recently the newly-appointed prime minister of Britain used offensive, sexist name-calling at his opposing leader in a bid to make him stop talking, while previously describing burka-wearing ladies in uncomplimentary language. In recent years it has become a common occurrence for the leader of the United States to harangue opponents (and indeed supporters) publicly for their weight, their looks, even their physical disability, while using derogatory swear words to dismiss another country.
However, no matter what ‘–ist’ term we choose to give to these barbs, put-downs and insults, it comes down simply to this. What we see is commonly referred to nowadays as dissing on a massive scale. Dissing may in fact be termed an affront, barb, brickbat, dig, indignity, insult, put-down, slight, slur, cussing, belittling, cursing, slandering, mockery. Some might try to argue it is only playful teasing yet the path it sits on is short and slippery — we move from teasing to taunting to testing to threatening all too quickly. Dissing quite simply is the opposite of boasting — as boasting is a means of bringing ourselves up so dissing is a method to bring others down. It is aimed at demeaning the other and it comes in many different forms or words.
But, of course, dissing is nothing new. It has come in all sorts of different shapes, sizes, names (and “diss-guises”) for thousands of years. And let us call it for what it is. It is, quite simply, bullying. It is seeking to take advantage of another. It is a means of gaining power and control. It is deeply hurtful. It is “diss-respect”. In fact, dissing has now become a “diss-ease”.
Students of the English language will know that the prefix ‘dis’ indicates a negative connotation; everything, therefore, about dissing is negative. Dissing is destructive, debilitating, unnecessary, ugly, “diss-abling”. No good comes from it whatsoever, even if we have different reactions to all such dissing. It only brings “diss-cord” and “diss-dain”. And all of us are probably guilty of it, to some degree, though we may be “diss-turbed” and “diss-mayed” to consider we are guilty of dissing. We may be “diss-illusioned” and “diss-inclined” into thinking we are not thus minded. We may “diss-agree” and “diss-associate” from such a thought. We may “diss-ent” and “diss-tance” ourselves. But, in a word, dissing comes down to “diss-crimination”! And we should be “diss-gusted” by any form of it.
However, sadly we are seeing dissing increasingly and deliberately, subtly and blatantly. We are seeing it in person and in cyberspace. We are seeing it in countries’ leaders and in celebrities’ twitters. We are seeing it in schools and in homes. The sad thing is, we laugh at others when they do the dissing; in fact, we cheer, if it is against an opponent of ours, wrongly so. Yet when it is done to us we cry foul, rightly so.
In the place of dissing we must be positive people. If we want our pupils to be freed from dissing we need to keep it not only from our vocabulary but more importantly from our living and teaching. The only dissing we should tolerate is diss-cernment, diss-cipline, diss-cipleship, diss-covery, diss-cretion, diss-tinctiveness. We will certainly need discernment to understand that, discipline to put it into practice, discretion to explain it, distinctiveness to avoid it, discovery to learn it, discipleship to spread it.
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If we do not, it will be a diss-aster! Enough — no more dissing.
l Tim Middleton is the executive director of the Association of Trust Schools [ATS]. The views expressed in this article, however, are solely those of the author in his private capacity and do not necessarily represent the views of the ATS.
