Life would be so much simpler if we could tell our nearest and dearest the truth about how we feel about some of the things they do. It would be easier too if we in turn could accept positive criticism.Inside track with Grace Mutandwa
A male friend tells me he does not know how to tell his woman to ease up on her makeup. He says she is a naturally pretty woman but after her artwork with foundation, blusher, eye shadow and lipstick, she looks like a painted doll but he does not have the heart to tell her.
Makeup is supposed to accentuate your best attributes and sometimes it helps cover what you may think are blemishes. This particular woman has now added preposterous false eyelashes that look more like splayed wipers!
Following my discussion with my male friend, I asked a few other guys about things their women do that put them off.
The makeup topped the list but the way some women dress also made their guys uncomfortable.
I was told about women who look like pumped up dolls. They squeeze themselves into transparent tights with tops that barely cover their huge bums and then round it all off with a large belt that divides their bodies into two ridiculous looking drums.
Being fashion conscious is good if you know what flatters your figure and what turns you into a frumpy and insane — looking woman.
The world of fashion is highly developed now that you can get new stuff on the market everyday in sizes for everyone. But, the trick is to know which styles are suitable for the small woman and which ones are for the ample woman.
Hairstyles too make some men uncomfortable. Not every woman can carry off some of the ridiculous hairstyles we see on the rich and famous. When you have money you can afford to look mad. No one really cares.
Your money gets you all you want, be it boys or any other attention you might want. If you have pots of money, some men will want you even if you have moles, the size of a pothole. Sometimes money does buy happiness — you should just know where to shop!
Women who work for their money need to make realistic choices. If you think you look a bit too big for that outfit, then you are actually way too big for it. Rolling around looking like an oversized hurriedly packed bag will not earn you brownie points on the boyfriend circuit.
Some men do not like some of those false nails that look like you have been on the prowl with vampires. You can still have French tips or false nails that enhance the look of your fingers without making you look like a witch.
Just because your best friend Mary thinks attaching false eyelashes the size of bristles of a hairbrush is fashionable, does not mean you have to follow her in her battle for the prize of the most ridiculous look in Africa.
Take a good look in the mirror
If you are overdoing makeup to please men, which of course a couple of girlfriends admitted they were, then please do yourself and everyone else a favour and take a good look in the mirror before you leave home.
Make some informed fashion choices
Obviously some women who make weird fashion choices do so out of ignorance and sometimes arrogance. You might tell yourself that you do not care what anyone thinks but the truth is that you care. The fact that you are trying to pour yourself into an outfit four sizes smaller means you want to look like Jane.
We are all created differently and the sooner we accept that it is way easier to accept who you are than to imitate someone else, the better. People always look better and sexier when they are themselves. Work with what you have and turn it into a breathtaking piece of art, not a heap of fashion confusion.
Looking ghastly is not part of the woman’s liberation. An absence of sensible style is not proof of how far you have come in life.
You might look good with hair extensions but some brothers say they find it hard to make such heads a part of the romantic repertoire. Everything you do with every part of your body must at some point help your man share with you some of his skills. Running his fingers through those hair extension clumps is not something men find sexy.
Yes, of course you say you dress and do all those things so you feel good about yourself! But after you are done feeling good about yourself you do want your man to salivate after you. We do not live in a man-free vacuum. We like to impress men so do it the right way — keep it simple and classy.
Can you imagine rolling out of tights in front of your man? You might need to turn the lights off for that! Believe me, you can still be big and sexy but you just have to know what to wear and how your wear it. Even in affairs of the heart, image is everything. Dress to flatter, not scare.
If your man is honest with you about an outfit or your makeup, take it in the spirit it is given and use it to your best advantage. Friends who are honest with you about your fashion choices are diamonds you should cherish.
For feedback email Mudiwa2002@yahoo.com/twitter@GraceMutandwa1