If you had a second chance — the opportunity to do something over and do it differently — what would you choose to do over and what changes would you make? In life, the opportunity to erase the mistakes of the past and start over are a rare occurrence.
By Cynthia Chirinda Hakutangwi
Typically, your actions result in consequences, whether they are good or bad. Everyone makes mistakes. But not everyone is given an opportunity to make things right. Not everyone gets a second chance. That is why if you are given the opportunity to fix your wrongs, you should be careful and play your cards right. Remember that you can never make the same mistake twice because the second one was a choice. This is true. We have to learn from our mistakes so they never happen again. If an opportunity comes for you to do something all over again, can you do away with the things that you did wrong?
What do you regret?
A hospice nurse compiled hundreds of hospice patient responses, highlighting the top five regrets people who were dying had.
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.” “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.” “I wish that I had let myself be happier.” Easier said than done, right? We don’t think twice when we complain to our co-workers about another 60-hour work week, or when we have the best intentions to call that valuable person we haven’t seen in a while and lost touch with. But the truth is, life doesn’t come with a do-over. It doesn’t come with an endless string of opportunities or a giant eraser that cleans the page. So when the time comes, whether you are 35 and diagnosed with incurable brain cancer, or 102, celebrating your birthday with three generations of family and friends, and someone asks you, “Would you do it all differently” — would you? And after you ask yourself this question, will it be too late?
How have we managed our relationships?
None of us are perfect. As human beings, we make mistakes; some of a trivial nature, some a lot more significant. But we make them. And sometimes these mistakes affect other people and we have to ask for their forgiveness. But what happens if someone else makes a mistake that affects us, and we have to decide whether to give them a second chance? At many times in our lives, we will upset others; we will anger them, hurt them, bother them, disappoint them, or let them down. But then there are other times where we make them feel appreciated, cared for, and we give them all we can. We only try to live the best life we can, we try to make others happy the best way we know how; but sometimes we get it wrong. As do the people around us. However, when someone shows remorse, shows genuine promise that they are willing to try to change; that is when they might deserve a second chance with you. It is up to you whether you want to take that risk. The important thing for you to realise is that they could hurt you again; you might even regret giving them a second chance. BUT ask yourself this, what would you regret more — staying, but risk getting hurt again? Or walking away and losing something that may have been worth keeping?
Cynthia Hakutangwi is a communications and personal development consultant, life coach, author and strategist. If you would like assistance in relationship management and integrated goal-setting as you plan towards your significant goals, you can contact her on: E-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org. Facebook: Wholeness Incorporated.