What by Kudzai Timothy Kwaramba
What do you want out of your life? My heart paused at this question I fell into deep thought of what I admire, what infatuates me and what I envy But I just ended up asking myself do I really want this, I never thought this simple question could be so complex, And even deprive me of my sleep
What I want out of life amazes me because I seem to be unsure of that myself When this question comes from someone, desperately expecting an answer I look myself in deep introspection from every possible perception But all I see is a reflection of you coming back with the question
I lose myself so I can only find myself and brag to the world that I made it by myself I fly so I can only get a chance to touch the ground again I lose so I can really appreciate the value of gain I set myself for a journey so I can say I am home sick I build a wall so I can wreck it down I start a fire so I can put it out and the world sees me as a hero This seems like madness of a man not sure of what he wants but we are the same We all sleep so we can wake up don’t we We live to die to live and yet we die to live Don’t stress trying to crack the code
Because such is life, simple and complex all at once The sun rises just to set and sets just to rise, The seasons come to go and go just to come back, I guess that is why life is wonderful Once we stop to wonder then the I in life is gone Maybe I just want to wonder what I want and stay in the crisis of wanting everything there is to want Because I am sure we won’t ever come to a point of wanting less than there already because what we want is forever wanted by our hearts until we attain and start wanting more
But is this what I ever really wanted.
I want to be free but free from what So I venture to find oppression then set myself free I waste my youth because every single day of my life I just woke up as a youth I am convinced already that it won’t run out that’s why I spend it without caring coz every day I am making more Besides I ask myself how I got here in the first place. I don’t understand and I don’t need to Just the same applies for me wanting all that’s wantable Is that even a word? I don’t know I just wanted to use it because it felt wantable All choices on the table and all I have to do is choose what I want But all I choose is myself, I choose to be felt, I choose to feel, I choose to feel wanted and I am sure that answers the question
