I wish you enough

Sport
We go to a restaurant and are told we can eat whatever and as much as we want, so what do we do? If we are male, we fill our plate as full as possible and then come back for more; we approach the dessert table with delight (initially that read “with relish”, but on […]

We go to a restaurant and are told we can eat whatever and as much as we want, so what do we do? If we are male, we fill our plate as full as possible and then come back for more; we approach the dessert table with delight (initially that read “with relish”, but on reflection that seemed to be inappropriate in the circumstances), only to regret it not long afterwards. We eat too much and we feel utterly sick. In contrast, there are others who stand outside the same restaurant, not able to enter and eat anything; they in turn feel totally weak. In both situations, there is not enough.

school of sport:with TIM MIDDLETON

The hugely-popular film, The Greatest Showman, contained the powerful and emotive song entitled Never Enough, referred to in a previous article, and the words echo the thought expressed above: we never have enough but always seem to have either too much or too little. The song has the haunting words “All the shine of a thousand spotlights, all the stars we steal from the night sky will never be enough, never be enough. Towers of gold are still too little, these hands could hold the world but it’ll never be enough, never be enough, for me. Never, never, never, never, never, for me, for me.” It will never be enough, we hear, because the singer’s “darling” is not there.

In a similar vein, we do well to realise, understand and accept in the sports world that “All the shine of a thousand victories, all the stars we beat in the sports world will never be enough, never be enough. Trophies of gold are still too little; these legs could hold the world record but it’ll never be enough, never be enough, for me. Never, never, never, never, never, for me, for me.” In short, without contentment, it will all never be enough and we will never be enough. People say they would be thrilled to be capped just once by their country – but once they have won that first cap they want another. One cap is never enough. Others say they would be delighted just to win one cup – but again, once the first cup is won they want another. It is never enough. Never, never, never.

In that regard, we do well in school sport to apply the lessons from a beautiful piece entitled I Wish You Enough that was narrated by Bob Perks, in Chicken Soup For the Grieving Soul. The writer watches an emotional farewell between a man and his daughter at an airport and is intrigued by their parting words, “I wish you enough”. On enquiring of the elderly gentleman what this meant he was told that “When we said ‘I wish you enough,’ we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with enough good things to sustain them.” He expanded on this and said, “I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright. I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more. I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive. I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger. I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting. I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess. I wish enough ‘Hello’s to get you through the final ‘Good-bye.’”

So in sport, it will never be enough until we have experienced the wins and the losses, and appreciated both for what they bring. We need to go through injury to respect and value our fitness. We need the starts and the substitutions, the wickets and the runs, the setbacks and the successes.

It all fits in closely with the Biblical exhortation (in Philippians 4:12) where the writer Paul expressed how he had learned the secret of contentment: “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” We must help our children to learn the secret of contentment in their sport if they are going to enjoy sport and continue with sport, be it socially or professionally. In order to find contentment, they must first attain control and secondly show conservation (of energy and emotion), as must gentlemen at the laden food table. Greed and hunger are equally dangerous, in sport and nutrition. We must learn and teach the place of enough.

Sadly it all too often appears that the performances of our children are never enough for their coaches and parents, who seem only interested in the show but then, for the greatest showman, applause and acclaim are never enough. In contrast, the greatest sportsman will be the one who knows what is enough, who has learned the secret of being content in any sporting situation. So, now, enough! We must not make you sick or weak; we simply wish you enough in your sport.

l Tim Middleton is a former international hockey player and headmaster, currently serving as the Executive Director of the Association of Trust Schools Email: [email protected]